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Like all of you, I'm a number of things to a number of people...Navy wife, homeschooling mama, educated woman and aspiring writer. Read my thoughts on all of it here. Please feel free to leave your thoughts on all of it too!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

How Did It All Go Wrong?

I'm not a perfect mother and our kids, as darling as they can be when sleeping, are far from perfect too. Recently, they've been reasonably well-behaved, though. Even I have been impressed...until today.

Jace instructed Tyler to drop a rock on Gracie's back. Tyler's two. Jace is seven. One of them should have known better, right? Gracie later kicked Jace in the head. She's five, old enough to know not to kick people in the head.

So, where did it all go wrong?

A few weeks ago Primal Toad linked to a great article on primal parenting. I read through it, nodding my head, thinking "Yes...yes...we do that..." Then I hit hunter-gatherer concept #3. I stopped nodding quite so enthusiastically. In fact, I cocked my head to the side and wondered, "Really?"

"The way of the hunter-gatherer is based on a whole new level of trust, trust that children are people capable of making good decisions without external motivators."

Really? Yesterday, after I told them they couldn't slide down the steps into the front door on the top of a tote, Jace did tell Gracie, "You don't need to get your helmet. Mama won't let us go sliding." That's half a good decision I guess.

Apparently I need to work on my trust in their decision making to become a true primal parent. I'll do that...as long as they work on their good decision making. When that all happens we'll be able to turn things around and everything will go right again. I look forward to more of those days and less of days where people are kicking and hitting and...being kids.

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