The Nose

If there is anything I've learned in the last almost six years of parenting its that there are so many conversations you'll have that you never imagined having. Kids burst out with embarrassing personal information at inappropriate times, forcing you to blush, quiet, and recover all at the same time. Then there's the amount of time you'll spend discussing poop. Who knew? Then there's the conversations that start with, "Mama..." said in that whiny, sad, 'I don't want to get in trouble but I have to tell you this' voice. I had one of those tonight.

Jace had been in bed for almost 20 minutes when he peeked out of his door. "Mama..."

"What Jace?"

"Mama, this morning Gracie stuck a bead up my nose and it's stuck."

What? What? I was certain I had heard him wrong and made him repeat himself. I hadn't misheard...Gracie stuck a bead up his nose and it was stuck. All day. Goodness me.

I sat him on the toilet and got out tweezers, Q-tips, Neosporin, tissues and a flashlight. I didn't really know what to do and tried to buy a little time by preparing for anything. I decided to look for the pink bead first and shined the light into his little nostril. Honestly, I've never looked up a nose before. Interesting...even more so when there's a bead lodged up there!

Luckily, all it took was a good blowing of the nose to uncork his nose from his sister's deviousness. I patted him on the head, tucked him back in bed, and went to Gracie's room. She was still awake and immediately denied having stuck anything in Jace's nose. "Jace did it, not me."

Back to Jace's room...when confronted with the truth, he admitted sticking the bead in his own nose and trying to get away with it by blaming his (for once) innocent sister. Although I wanted to scream I didn't...just got myself some chai and sat back to tell you all about it.

Now I find myself shaking my head...what was he thinking? Why was he lying? What am I going to do for the next 13 years? Maybe I'll go back to talking about poop.